This morning I was listening to sports talk radio until the typical 5-7 minutes of commercials came on. So I flipped over to some of the political talk radio channels that weren't stuck on commercials. Both sides were Blaming, Attacking & Mocking [BAM] the other sides for all the problems in this country. It's the other guys fault. The BAM game is ugly and I am tired of it. Is the other side the hypocrite who judges wrongly? Does this go beyond politics? Who are the real, true judgmental hypocrites?
Aren't we all? I am. I know that. I have to fight it all the time. If we were honest, we would have to agree that we all are. It goes way beyond just politics or religion. Isn't this why we yell at the bad drivers on the road? Even if we use kinder words than others in our criticism, at the heart is still the hate that is in our heart. How about complaining about the new hair or clothing fashions of stars and celebrities? "Oh, I like her better as a blond." Well, that's not our life job. We aren't here to tell people how to dress, what to look like, etc. This is just like my blog below that many people won't like. "I want it my way, or else!" We make everything all about us. Guess what? Life ain't. We aren't God. In fact we aren't even god of our lives. We don't control circumstances, people, events. And when we try we are left frustrated and grumpy. "Why won't everybody just do and be what I want?"
I laugh at the "Happy Bunny" sarcastic clothing line. I guess I laugh because it is as mean as I am. Sick! Have you seen one of it's famous lines? "You suck, and that's sad." At a concert last week one of my son's friends wore a jersey that had this on the back: "You're Scum." Isn't that what we tell or think toward those who differ from us in looks, opinions and tastes? "You don't like __________? You must be a stupid idiot!"
As a follower of Jesus I often hear how bad Christians are. We are all such judgmental hypocrites. I beg to differ. It's a sickness we all have. Some are just easier targets than others. Have you watched any reality TV lately? A common theme is: "Don't judge me, just accept me." We all want to be loved and accepted. We desire to be built up and cared for. If we can get honest, we need to wrestle with how we treat others out loud and in our hearts. We all judge. We are all hypocrites in transition, [Erwin McManus]. But what kind of transition are we making? Are we making progress in love or escalating our critiquing skills? Are we screaming out for love and acceptance of our immoral lives so we can do whatever we want and still have it our way? Do we really want to make a better world? Or are we just toddlers whining so we can get our way?
I love you. I am sorry for being such a jerk. Help me work on that.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
American Idols
The idols of the USA are not the singers and non-singers on Simon’s TV show. Our idol is self. And at that, only a part of our self. We are all pleasure seekers. I am a pleasure addict. I have to fight my selfish impulses in order to love and care for others.
One of our main pleasure idols for ourselves is sex. We know it can feel great and help us escape our sometimes mundane existence. But when it is all about us it is destructive. When I hide from others to pursue porn pleasure I tear down other relationships. When I give in to my basest urges, others lose. What if Ted Haggard gave into Oprah's badgering and was "honest" with himself and admitted he is a homosexual? How would that affect his family? Oprah was more ticked that he was not, by her judgment, being honest with himself than she would be saddened if that further tore apart his marriage and family.
Why has our society declared sex as the greatest life achievement? We make more money so we can take better vacations at better hotels so we can have more sex. We take all kinds of pills to make sex better and supposedly safer. We exercise a lot and eat better or jump on the latest diet fad so we can have more and better sex. Cosmo, Men's Health, etc. are all about looking good and knowing the right or best techniques to get more people to have more fun sex with. Who cares about loyalty, commitment, monogamy? Those are all anachronistic wastes of my pleasure time. The time is now.
Why have we claimed sexual freedom as our highest good? We scream for the right to have sex with whomever, whenever we want. Some scream for the right to have sex with a whatever. "Ick!" This is all without concern for consequences. We scream for the reproductive freedom to terminate an unwanted pregnancy since the child would interfere with our freedom. It must be our choice alone without meddling from those who might disagree. We can take pills, shots and creams for nearly every other consequence of our flings. Their ads are all over the place telling us after we use their product we can continue without delay or fear. We don’t necessarily have to tell a future partner of a prior virus or disease. We define ourselves by our sexuality rather than who we are. It seems it is all about our sexual release. After all, we were born this way, so why change or exercise self-control? But what would happen if we lost the ability to have sex? Then who are we? Does that ruin our life?
Have you heard what is going on in California? Here is some info from Chuck Colson's Breakpoint newsletter:
Opponents of traditional marriage have sent threatening emails and vandalized churches. They have forced supporters out of their jobs and boycotted their businesses. They’ve made abusive telephone calls and even threatened their neighbors with death. Hundreds of cases of harassment have been documented.
Ron Prentice, chairman of the pro-Proposition 8 group ProtectMarriage.com, says the message of the maps “is unmistakable: Support traditional marriage, and we will find you.”
This is unbelievable in a democracy. In fact, “domestic terrorism” is not too strong a word to use for what’s occurring in California—and it’s a reminder of what happened when citizens allowed similar tactics to go unchallenged in another time and place. He goes on to show how Hitler's youth followers harassed and abused anyone Adolf opposed.
So doing life and sex God's way are the enemy? Now that's the loving way to treat others! Not exactly the role model Jesus set for us. So, who is really the intolerant and the judgmental?
One of our main pleasure idols for ourselves is sex. We know it can feel great and help us escape our sometimes mundane existence. But when it is all about us it is destructive. When I hide from others to pursue porn pleasure I tear down other relationships. When I give in to my basest urges, others lose. What if Ted Haggard gave into Oprah's badgering and was "honest" with himself and admitted he is a homosexual? How would that affect his family? Oprah was more ticked that he was not, by her judgment, being honest with himself than she would be saddened if that further tore apart his marriage and family.
Why has our society declared sex as the greatest life achievement? We make more money so we can take better vacations at better hotels so we can have more sex. We take all kinds of pills to make sex better and supposedly safer. We exercise a lot and eat better or jump on the latest diet fad so we can have more and better sex. Cosmo, Men's Health, etc. are all about looking good and knowing the right or best techniques to get more people to have more fun sex with. Who cares about loyalty, commitment, monogamy? Those are all anachronistic wastes of my pleasure time. The time is now.
Why have we claimed sexual freedom as our highest good? We scream for the right to have sex with whomever, whenever we want. Some scream for the right to have sex with a whatever. "Ick!" This is all without concern for consequences. We scream for the reproductive freedom to terminate an unwanted pregnancy since the child would interfere with our freedom. It must be our choice alone without meddling from those who might disagree. We can take pills, shots and creams for nearly every other consequence of our flings. Their ads are all over the place telling us after we use their product we can continue without delay or fear. We don’t necessarily have to tell a future partner of a prior virus or disease. We define ourselves by our sexuality rather than who we are. It seems it is all about our sexual release. After all, we were born this way, so why change or exercise self-control? But what would happen if we lost the ability to have sex? Then who are we? Does that ruin our life?
Have you heard what is going on in California? Here is some info from Chuck Colson's Breakpoint newsletter:
Opponents of traditional marriage have sent threatening emails and vandalized churches. They have forced supporters out of their jobs and boycotted their businesses. They’ve made abusive telephone calls and even threatened their neighbors with death. Hundreds of cases of harassment have been documented.
Ron Prentice, chairman of the pro-Proposition 8 group ProtectMarriage.com, says the message of the maps “is unmistakable: Support traditional marriage, and we will find you.”
This is unbelievable in a democracy. In fact, “domestic terrorism” is not too strong a word to use for what’s occurring in California—and it’s a reminder of what happened when citizens allowed similar tactics to go unchallenged in another time and place. He goes on to show how Hitler's youth followers harassed and abused anyone Adolf opposed.
So doing life and sex God's way are the enemy? Now that's the loving way to treat others! Not exactly the role model Jesus set for us. So, who is really the intolerant and the judgmental?
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Subtleties – stuff we don’t need
Much of marketing and entertainment is aimed at getting us to believe we are less than we need to be. We don’t have enough stuff to satisfy our souls. We don’t look good enough for the people we need to please. We don’t have the latest and greatest so we are incomplete. We don’t have a big enough house and it’s not in the right part of town. Our car needs upgrading. We know for sure our phone does. And our flat screen TV.
Genesis 3:6 “When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; and she gave also to her husband with her, and he ate.”
It’s the same old ploy that has been used against people from our beginning. Hey, look! There’s something over there you don’t have. But, wow! You sure need it. See how nice it looks? It’s shiny and pretty and cool and necessary for fulfillment. Not only that, it is desirable. I see it. I like it. I want it. I need it. I have to have it or I will die. It will complete me.
Oh, but it isn’t any good for me. It will make me rely on it and other things more than I do on God. That’s OK. I am pursuing the American dream—happiness; and of course, that means going after happiness my way.
Genesis 3:6 “When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; and she gave also to her husband with her, and he ate.”
It’s the same old ploy that has been used against people from our beginning. Hey, look! There’s something over there you don’t have. But, wow! You sure need it. See how nice it looks? It’s shiny and pretty and cool and necessary for fulfillment. Not only that, it is desirable. I see it. I like it. I want it. I need it. I have to have it or I will die. It will complete me.
Oh, but it isn’t any good for me. It will make me rely on it and other things more than I do on God. That’s OK. I am pursuing the American dream—happiness; and of course, that means going after happiness my way.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Purity Pledge - Worth the Wait
As a father of 3 and step-father of two, a pastor who works a lot with teenagers, this night means a lot to me. My wife and I want our children to hold up this pledge as a truth to live by as they live out their faith in Jesus as the One Who rescued them from sin and darkness bringing them into His light. He designed life for His glory. When we follow Him, we have joy and freedom that cannot be found any other way. That is the basis of this pledge. I’ll read each line, explain it a little, and then we will read the whole pledge together as you commit yourself to it:
With confidence, strength, and integrity, today I make this promise to God, myself, my family, my future spouse, and my future children:
God wants us to love Him with all our heart, mind, soul and strength. Never underestimate the importance of relying on God’s strength to live a holy and obedient life of worship to Him. I pray for you a life of purity and holiness so that you are not followed by the struggles I have had to deal with because I did not know nor obey Jesus’ until I was 20. Your future life and family are worth this promise. Look at this as an honor to merely delay sexual pleasures until the honeymoon. It is not a punishment or torture to wait. God knows what is best; after all, it’s His design—marriage between one man and one woman for life. Let’s turn our culture around by obeying God and loving Jesus through how we treat each other and live out our marriages.
I will remain sexually pure until the day I give myself as a wedding gift to my spouse.
Everything in our society says this is unrealistic and not worth the wait. A TV show I saw last week said, “teens are going to have sex, they are all doing it.” Then it went on to expect teens to keep having sex; even though, some in the show were HIV positive. Let’s prove that those are lies. People who give into these lies will struggle with memories, comparisons and most-likely several diseases that only God can heal. If you save yourself for marriage, you will save yourself and spouse from a lot of stuff. And dealing with stuff ain’t worth it. Start over if you haven’t waited. All of you, stay completely sexually pure until married. Don’t do other things or see how far you can go. Once the blood gets flowing, you are going too far. Save yourself to be a wonderful gift that will pay off huge dividends in your future marriage. Ask your parents if you don’t know what a dividend is. Study about dividends so you can be a wise business person in these tough times. Being able to say that you waited until marriage is a gift that will amaze the people around you and provides a level of trust in your marriage that truly is priceless.
I know this requires support from my family and friends, as well as setting boundaries for myself and avoiding compromising situations.
I will not allow anyone to discourage me or pressure me from fulfilling this goal.
Listen to wise counsel that helps you avoid giving in. Be careful who you get advice from. Setting boundaries in every area of your life is vital to being a healthy adult. Being foolish with credit can get you in debt—only spend what you have but save for the future and give to God’s work. Your physical life is similar. The boundaries need to be set so you aren’t exposing yourself to some physical pleasure now that you will be paying off the interest for a long time. The marriage bed is far more than merely physical. It is a celebration of body, soul and mind meant to be a worship service of the God who created us for His pleasure. He allows us to have this great joy in marriage to make the loving union stronger. Guard it like the treasure it is.
I make this pledge today in the presence of God, my friends, and family who will support me and hold me accountable for the protection of my future.
We can only be held accountable if we are honest with those who care enough to ask us if we are on the right track. It’s a lot easier to say that the boundaries are in place, you haven’t compromised and you are on the right track than it is to deal with the consequences and guilt of giving in. Remember, if we fail and turn back to God there is forgiveness and grace. But, WOW! How much greater it will be when you stand at the wedding looking your soon to be lover in the eyes and say, “We made it. I waited for you. And I don’t have to wait anymore for the fantastic joy of sharing myself completely with you for the rest of my life.” That will make this all worth the wait, just as God intended. Many people are here to love, support and cheer for you. Help us help you so you can have the joy-filled marriage relationship God desires for you.
Now, if you are ready, please read out loud with me as you make this commitment:
With confidence, strength, and integrity, today I make this promise to God, myself, my family, my future spouse, and my future children: I will remain sexually pure until the day I give myself as a wedding gift to my spouse. I know this requires support from my family and friends, as well as setting boundaries for myself and avoiding compromising situations. I will not allow anyone to discourage me or pressure me from fulfilling this goal. I make this pledge today in the presence of God, my friends, and family who will support me and hold me accountable for the protection of my future.
PRAYER
“I’m very much about ‘no sex before marriage.’ When I was 12 years old, I said to my mom, ‘I want to follow what the Bible says—would you buy me this ring? I want to wear it and promise it.’ She got it for me, right then and there, and it was awesome. And I’ve worn it ever since. I think it’s easier when the guy believes the same thing as you do, so you’re not always fighting a battle.”
- Actress/pop star Miley Cyrus speaking about her purity ring and whether guys she dates have to share her beliefs, Seventeen , September 2008, p. 198.
“To us, the rings are a constant reminder to live a life of values. It’s about being a gentleman, treating people with respect and being the best guys we can be.”
- Jonas Brothers’ Nick Jonas speaking about the purity rings the brothers wear, Rolling Stone, August 7, 2008, p. 100.
With confidence, strength, and integrity, today I make this promise to God, myself, my family, my future spouse, and my future children:
God wants us to love Him with all our heart, mind, soul and strength. Never underestimate the importance of relying on God’s strength to live a holy and obedient life of worship to Him. I pray for you a life of purity and holiness so that you are not followed by the struggles I have had to deal with because I did not know nor obey Jesus’ until I was 20. Your future life and family are worth this promise. Look at this as an honor to merely delay sexual pleasures until the honeymoon. It is not a punishment or torture to wait. God knows what is best; after all, it’s His design—marriage between one man and one woman for life. Let’s turn our culture around by obeying God and loving Jesus through how we treat each other and live out our marriages.
I will remain sexually pure until the day I give myself as a wedding gift to my spouse.
Everything in our society says this is unrealistic and not worth the wait. A TV show I saw last week said, “teens are going to have sex, they are all doing it.” Then it went on to expect teens to keep having sex; even though, some in the show were HIV positive. Let’s prove that those are lies. People who give into these lies will struggle with memories, comparisons and most-likely several diseases that only God can heal. If you save yourself for marriage, you will save yourself and spouse from a lot of stuff. And dealing with stuff ain’t worth it. Start over if you haven’t waited. All of you, stay completely sexually pure until married. Don’t do other things or see how far you can go. Once the blood gets flowing, you are going too far. Save yourself to be a wonderful gift that will pay off huge dividends in your future marriage. Ask your parents if you don’t know what a dividend is. Study about dividends so you can be a wise business person in these tough times. Being able to say that you waited until marriage is a gift that will amaze the people around you and provides a level of trust in your marriage that truly is priceless.
I know this requires support from my family and friends, as well as setting boundaries for myself and avoiding compromising situations.
I will not allow anyone to discourage me or pressure me from fulfilling this goal.
Listen to wise counsel that helps you avoid giving in. Be careful who you get advice from. Setting boundaries in every area of your life is vital to being a healthy adult. Being foolish with credit can get you in debt—only spend what you have but save for the future and give to God’s work. Your physical life is similar. The boundaries need to be set so you aren’t exposing yourself to some physical pleasure now that you will be paying off the interest for a long time. The marriage bed is far more than merely physical. It is a celebration of body, soul and mind meant to be a worship service of the God who created us for His pleasure. He allows us to have this great joy in marriage to make the loving union stronger. Guard it like the treasure it is.
I make this pledge today in the presence of God, my friends, and family who will support me and hold me accountable for the protection of my future.
We can only be held accountable if we are honest with those who care enough to ask us if we are on the right track. It’s a lot easier to say that the boundaries are in place, you haven’t compromised and you are on the right track than it is to deal with the consequences and guilt of giving in. Remember, if we fail and turn back to God there is forgiveness and grace. But, WOW! How much greater it will be when you stand at the wedding looking your soon to be lover in the eyes and say, “We made it. I waited for you. And I don’t have to wait anymore for the fantastic joy of sharing myself completely with you for the rest of my life.” That will make this all worth the wait, just as God intended. Many people are here to love, support and cheer for you. Help us help you so you can have the joy-filled marriage relationship God desires for you.
Now, if you are ready, please read out loud with me as you make this commitment:
My Pledge for Purity
With confidence, strength, and integrity, today I make this promise to God, myself, my family, my future spouse, and my future children: I will remain sexually pure until the day I give myself as a wedding gift to my spouse. I know this requires support from my family and friends, as well as setting boundaries for myself and avoiding compromising situations. I will not allow anyone to discourage me or pressure me from fulfilling this goal. I make this pledge today in the presence of God, my friends, and family who will support me and hold me accountable for the protection of my future.
PRAYER
“I’m very much about ‘no sex before marriage.’ When I was 12 years old, I said to my mom, ‘I want to follow what the Bible says—would you buy me this ring? I want to wear it and promise it.’ She got it for me, right then and there, and it was awesome. And I’ve worn it ever since. I think it’s easier when the guy believes the same thing as you do, so you’re not always fighting a battle.”
- Actress/pop star Miley Cyrus speaking about her purity ring and whether guys she dates have to share her beliefs, Seventeen , September 2008, p. 198.
“To us, the rings are a constant reminder to live a life of values. It’s about being a gentleman, treating people with respect and being the best guys we can be.”
- Jonas Brothers’ Nick Jonas speaking about the purity rings the brothers wear, Rolling Stone, August 7, 2008, p. 100.
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